Before you start reading, let me save you some time. If you aren’t into goal setting, New Year Resolutions, or fresh starts this post isn’t for you. I’m all about this time of year. New Year’s is one of my favorite holidays. The space in your calendar between December 25 and January 1 is sacred space if you use it right. It’s a time to clean house, purge, get rid of the old, evaluate where you’ve been, and align yourself again to where you want to go.
I used to get extra hard on myself during this time of year. As if I needed to put more pressure on myself. I would look at my year and realize I fell horribly short in so many areas of my life. All those hopes and dreams I set out to accomplish were like open wounds. Almost painful reminders of all the things I didn’t get done. So I’d take that list and I’d fire myself up. I’d use it as motivation to do better, to push harder, and to focus more. I’d give myself a word for the next year that was full of gusto, determination, and grit.
It never worked.
Nope. All that purging, re-evaluating, and motivation kept burning out as quickly as it came in. The feelings of doubt and failure kept compounding year after year. Even though there has been great success, I kept focusing on the shortcomings. I rarely stopped to celebrate or give myself any credit for the progress in my life. This year, it all came crashing down.
These past six months I’ve been working on something really special – myself. It was time. The temporary band aids I had been using weren’t working anymore. I was putting so much time, energy and money into the struggle, the stuck feelings, and the scarcity. It was like my inside was screaming to get out there and BE the person I knew I was meant to BE, but my external actions no longer aligned. Truthfully, it was the craziest feeling. At one point I told a dear friend I thought I was having some sort of quarter/mid life crisis! It wasn’t until someone told me, “It sounds like you are shifting” did I realize I wasn’t crazy but actually gearing up for more greatness.
It was time to stop pushing.
Those old ways of pushing, determination, achievement, and grit left me feeling like a failure. It took the joyous time of the New Year and gave it a temporary high. I was spread thin, burned out quickly, and spent the majority of the year doubting myself. I’m so excited about this year because I get to feel a whole new way. I get to feel light and joyous and peaceful. I am celebrating all the GOOD that I did versus focusing on all the things that didn’t get done. I get to be fricken me. And so do you, my friend. So do you.
I want to keep encouraging you this year.
Tune into the podcast for more encouragement on how to have your best year yet.